Are You A Giver or a Taker?

While you may be quick to answer "I'm a giver", most people only give when it suits them or when they feel they may get something for their giving.

At work, employees are generally "takers" thinking about what they can get out of their boss or how much money they can earn. They only do what they have to and are recognised by showing little enthusiasm and little willingness to help either the employer or the customer. They are forever whinging about their work.

The boss or manager is a "taker" when they use their employees without giving anything back. They hold the attitude "I'm the boss and I tell them what to do". Some bosses are never happy regardless of how hard the employee works. They hold the opinion the employee is lucky to have a job.

Most people who work in shops are takers. They're only interested in getting your money.

When things get financially tight, they become even bigger ‘takers' as they need the money.

Many business people I meet at networking functions only consider themselves and their needs. They continually talk about how good they are, what their product does and why people should buy from them.

At one of these functions, I spoke with a lady for around 15 minutes. At the end of the conversation, while I knew all about her, she never took the time to ask my name, what I did, my business frustrations or why I was at the event.

It is easy to be a "taker" in a relationship. Relationships start out with both people giving (to impress each other) and, when they become complacent and no longer need to impress, they become ‘takers'. They identify what they can get out of the relationship by doing their own thing or expecting their partner to do what they want.

A "taker" often says or thinks "What's in it for me?" and "What can I get out of this?"

You may even be thinking ‘takers' are somewhat selfish.

Identify where you are a "taker".

Now ...

Practice being a "giver"

In the business world, things are very much changing. The new model is one of giving.

"How can I make my customer's day better, more enjoyable?"

"What can I do for them or share with them that can make their day and business more productive?"

What can you do for your customers to make their experience of dealing with you one to remember?

How can you add value?

Identify what you can give to your work. What can you do to help your boss out without being asked? How can you go that extra mile and give something back to your place of employment?

If you are a boss or manager, what can you do to show you value your employees? You may praise them, give them something or reward them in some way. Research shows people who are rewarded, praised and valued perform to a higher level.

At a networking event, ask about the other person. Find out their frustrations and offer ways to help - perhaps by sending them a free report.

How can you contribute in your relationship? What can you do to make your partner's day (or your parent's day) even better or more special?

When you give unconditionally (that means not wanting or needing anything back), the person receiving often wants to reciprocate so they give. When you receive, you feel great so you give ... and the cycle continues.

Here's a challenge: Do something today for someone you don't know. You may help an elderly person to complete a task or visit someone in hospital who is feeling lonely. You may send someone a report that can help them overcome some problem they are having.

Note how you feel and how the person you are helping feels.

Giving unconditionally releases good fell chemicals (endorphins) within your body - which in return raises your immune system.

Leave a message below on how you have helped someone. It would be great to share how you contribute to helping others and the responses you receive.