Act on What You Read

This week, I’ve decided to write about something a little different.

Many of my clients comment on how they read many self-help books yet fail to implement what is written. One client said she reads one book a week to ensure she continually improves her life. While she can remember some of the theory, she is not practising any of it.

This problem not only affects people who read self-help books, it affects most people regardless of what they read.

Does this happen to you? Do you read something and either forget what you have read or you fail to take action on what you read?

An example is the books I have written. They all have exercises to do yet very few people complete these exercises. They simply read straight through them.

What is the function of reading a book or an article?

It should be to learn something.

Many simply read it to say they have finished that book!

Here is what I do …

When reading a book:

* I have a pencil and a highlighter nearby. I highlight key points and jot notes at the side of the text.

* If there is a key point I need to remember, I will either place a stick-on note on that page with a reference or write the key word and page number on a blank page at the back of the book. This gives me a quick reference. For example, ‘Abundance quote 68’ informs me this quote is on page 68.

This helps overcome “Where in this book is that quote on abundance?” and “In which book was that quote?” Instead of reading many books to find the quote, I simply read my reference page at the back.

* When I come across a point I find interesting or something I didn’t know, I will read it twice, bookmark it and then close the book. I then think about that point for a few days and consolidate it.

* Next, I act on that point. I practise the new behaviour until it is habit and I am able to do it automatically.

I have only learnt something when I have made it a part of my life.

Most people skimp over things and, without the practise, only have the theory.

Theory by itself isn’t much good. These are the people who say “I know what I should be doing but I don’t”.

As you can gather, reading a book for me can take much time. However, I do get the key points from it and I learn what I need to learn so the reading has been a great investment – in time and money.

Are you getting the best investment from your reading?

Let It Go ...

Sixteen years ago, while I was learning my trade, Julie and I were at a dinner party for eight. On arriving we discovered we knew the hosts but not the others. We also discovered the other were all friends.

During the course of the meal, the discussion turned to hypnotherapy. A lady brought the topic up by stating she had hypnosis, it didn't work and it was a sham.

Being a qualified hypnotherapist, I quickly became involved as I wanted to set her straight. "You are wrong" I stated forthrightly. The lady sat upright, her face started to go red and I could see she was keen to defend her point of view. "That's fine" I thought. Bring it on. I know I can win this one.

Julie kicked me under the table and gave me one of those "Let it go" looks as she could see where this was heading. I conceded I had heard of some people who had trouble being hypnotised and it certainly didn't work for every person. I then quickly, and in a nice way, changed the subject to another topic.

A valuable lesson was learnt that night.

Why prove she is wrong? Sure, it would have been good for my ego but it would have made her look foolish in front of her friends. I would have had an enemy (or many) for life.

Was she ever going to concede?

Her body language and aggression said "No". In fact, she would have become more set in her opinion.

Where do you have to be right - especially at the cost of someone being wrong?

Are you argumentative?

Sometimes it pays to let others be right, to have their ‘glory in the sun'. You know what they're saying is wrong but do you have to make them wrong and you right?

And who wins arguments?

If you are proven wrong, you lose. If you are proven right, you still lose because you have shown the other person to be inferior - and they will dislike you - or should I say ‘hate you' - for it.

If the argument became bitter with both having a ‘win at all costs' approach, the people present will not think highly of the person who started it, or the person who goes for ‘the jugular' to prove he or she is right. So you could end up with a lot of people disliking you!

A great trait to have is one where you can allow others to have their point of view - be it right or wrong. Others will soon work them out for who they are.

If you would like any help in this area, please feel free to contact us.